At the Truck Stop

A trucker walked into a roadside diner and said,

“I’ll take three flat tires, a pair of headlights, and a pair of running boards.”

The new blonde waitress, confused but trying not to show it, asked the cook what that meant.

“Three pancakes, two sunny-side-up eggs, and two strips of crispy bacon,” he explained.

“Ohhh!” she said.

She served the order — along with a bowl of beans.

“What are the beans for?” the trucker asked.

She smiled. “Figured while you’re waiting for the flat tires, headlights, and running boards… you might as well gas up!”

In the Noisy Restaurant

In a crowded diner, a blonde asked the waiter, “Where’s the ladies’ room?”

“I can’t hear you!” he shouted.

She leaned into his ear and repeated the question.

“On the other side!” he yelled.

So she walked around, leaned into his other ear, and asked again,

“Can you tell me where the ladies’ room is?”

The Bar Bet

Bob sat next to a blonde at a sports bar just before the 10 PM news. On TV, a man stood on a building ledge, threatening to jump.

“Think he’ll jump?” she asked.

“I bet he will,” Bob said.

“I’ll bet $20 he won’t.”

They put their money down — and seconds later, the man jumped.

She handed over the $20. “Fair’s fair.”

Bob sighed. “I can’t take it. I saw this on the 5 PM news. I knew he’d jump.”

She replied, “So did I… I just didn’t think he’d do it again.”

Bob took the money.