Online users are calling out a man who shared a story outlining his domestic expectations of his career-oriented girlfriend.
The woman, who’s on a brief hiatus from her position in “healthcare,” “has been living her best life” but he insists she spend her break doing more household chores.
“She won’t pick up my clothes after I have returned from work,” he writes. Keep reading to learn what users are saying about this man and his girlfriend’s position in healthcare!
A man, looking to rally support from the online community, shared his story on the ‘Am I the A**hole’ subreddit, detailing his household situation with his girlfriend.
Before outlining his issues, the man, who works an engineer, explains it “has nothing to do with money” and that everything – including rent and expenses – is equally split.
“One month ago, her contract ended, and she has been unemployed since. She has already found another job, but she would be able to start two months after her previous job ended, that means in a month from now,” he writes of his girlfriend, who works in “healthcare.” “So, for the past month she has been living her best life. She’s spending her mornings studying for her new job but also reading, watching Netflix, going to the gym and for runs with her dog etc.”
Unopened mail
She’s also failing to meet his expectations around the home.
The original poster (OP) then notes that “she still cooks and cleans every day but she still expects me to wash the dishes and she won’t pick up my clothes after I have returned from work.”
Adding to that, he makes a cringeworthy comment about her not opening the mail that he left on the table. “When I returned it was left unopened, I asked her why she didn’t look through it and she told me she’s not my secretary.”
He then says he’s been “hinting” that she should pick up “more chores now that she’s unemployed but she says that she’s not my housekeeper, she does more than half of the chores and since my workload has not increased, I should be able to do mine.”
Agreeing with her suggestion, the OP adds, “I mean yes, I am able to do it, but I am tired from work and she isn’t, so I had expected her to step up a little but no.”
Before asking Redditors “AITA For expecting her to do most of the chores while she’s unemployed?” he concludes: “she claims this is her break from working hard and other hurtful things, like she didn’t go to med school to be a live-in maid etc.”
‘Minimizing her accomplishments’
While the author, very likely, was hoping to rally some support, he instead came under attack.
Unsettled over him being so vague with her position in “healthcare,” and for lacking compassion, the online community unanimously voted that yes, “You’re the a**hole.”
“Not being fully transparent with [her job]. You subtly slipped it in that she went to med school, so I’m going to assume that what’s going on is that she just finished her residency, and has two months before she starts her first job as an attending (aka a doctor not under the supervision of other doctors)…and you even mentioned she’s studying up during this period to prepare for the new position.” The comment continues, “…spoiler alert: doctors pretty much always have to study constantly throughout their career.”
Also suspecting the OP left out some important information, a second writes, “’My girlfriend works in healthcare’ LMAO he was really trying to hide that.”
A third shares, “He’s deliberately minimizing her accomplishments to try to make himself look less like an AH. I would dump him the instant he expressed that he expected me to go through his mail.”
Meanwhile, other users zoned in on his unrealistic expectations: “Seriously picking up his dirty clothes that he just drops on the floor instead of bringing them to the laundry and curating his mail for him, what is he five?” asks one.
Another cyber fan adds, “You’re lucky she didn’t dump you for even implying she should be your personal maid. She’s enjoying a well-deserved break while still contributing to the household. You just sound bitter and terrible.”
