Do you fart in bed ?

If this story doesn’t make you cry for laughing so hard, let me know and I’ll pray for you. This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years, the only friction in their marriage was the husband’s habit of farting loudly every morning when he awoke the noise would wake his wife and the smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air.

Every morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them off because it was making her sick. He told her he couldn’t stop it and that it was perfectly natural. She told him to see a doctor, she was concerned that one day he would blow his guts out.

The years went by and he continued to rip them out. Then one Christmas day morning, as she was preparing the turkey for dinner and he was upstairs sound asleep, she looked at the innards, neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare parts, and a malicious thought came to her. She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband was sound asleep and, gently pulling the bed covers back, she pulled back the elastic waistband of his underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts. Sometime later she heard her husband waken with his usual trumpeting which was followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as he ran into the bath room.

The wife could hardly control herself as she rolled on the floor laughing, tears in her eyes! After years of torture she reckoned she had got him back pretty good. About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his blood stained underpants with a look of horror on his face.

She bit her lip as she asked him what was the matter. He said, “Honey you were right… all these years you have warned me and I didn’t listen to you.” “What do you mean?” asked his wife. “Well, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts out, and today it finally happened, but by the grace of god, some Vaseline and two fingers. I think I got most of them back in……………….…..”

Don’t just keep it, share it along on Facebook!

Related Posts

My parents selected my sister over me and were unable to attend my wedding.

For birthdays, graduations, and small victories, my parents always focused on my sister. After years of feeling ignored, one man shared his story. I have a sister…

Incredible Stories of People Who Got Very Lucky

Story 1 I’m the girl who passed a man’s “money test.” A guy asked me to a cafe. I ordered food that I could afford. At the…

My son was ashamed of me and said: ’I don’t want people to think we came together,’ so I repaid him in the same manner

My son was ashamed of me and said: ’I don’t want people to think we came together,’ so I repaid him in the same manner Raising a…

BRE*AKING: Jack Smith Officially

The Department of Justice (DOJ) has filed a motion to dismiss the federal criminal case against President-elect Donald J. Trump. The DOJ’s decision hinges on longstanding interpretations…

Poor Man Fulfills Late Grannys Last Wish to Rebuild Her House, Finds Cellar Buried Next to It

After their grandmother’s passing, Harry and his brother Walter were summoned to the lawyer’s office. Walter was eager, expecting a significant inheritance. Years earlier, when their grandfather…

10 Real Stories of Kindness That Pour Honey on People’s Souls

Being kind is really important since it can bring people together and create positive outcomes. Even modest acts of kindness can set off a chain reaction that…

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *